Plus, when you sign up, a big discount will come your way. Wow. A discount for signing up! Who thought of this wildly original concept?
I CALL COFFEE MY MORNING COCKTAIL. AND, YOU CAN ADD MORE THAN CREAM AND SUGAR TO OUR COFFEE. JUST SAYING...
HOW DOES OUR COFFEE TASTE? FRANKLY THE BEST IN THE GALAXY. FULL DISCLOSURE AS OF YET, WE HAVE HAD ZERO ENTRIES FROM NON-EARTH ROASTERS.
EVERY STEP IN THE MORNING IS ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN... UNTIL I GET TO MY COFFEEMAKER.
LOOKING FOR DECAF? YEAH, WE DON'T MAKE IT. OUR COFFEE HAS A ROCKET ON THE BAG. JUST KIDDING... LOOK FOR RR DECAF IN 2019.
DRINKING COFFEE IN THE MORNING WAKES ME UP. BUT SPILLING COFFEE DOWN MY CHEST WORKS SO MUCH BETTER.